Adventures of Crab Santa

Last week insider sources tipped me off to a cracking deal on fresh crab. So I promptly appeared on Wharf Two Friday afternoon to pick up 11 from a lady fisherman named DeLay.

Jane DeLay ain't your average crabber. A dancer and former executive director of the Forest Theater Guild, she normally spends her time studying to be a nurse at MPC, working at the Monterey Bay Sanctuary Foundation and serving Greek grub at Episilon in Monterey. But that doesn't mean she wouldn't give it all up, as she did in taking a month off.

"I'd fish full-time," she says, "but with all the shortened seasons, that's not the reality."

She grabs her crabs in Half Moon Bay—the nearby San Fran bay nursery grounds and sandy bottoms tend to yield the biggest and most mature crabs early in the season, she says—aboard her captain friend Mike Ricketts' (no relation to Doc) Sea Hauk.

She calls herself the crew of the operation; Nellie here is security detail when they get back to shore.

They throw traps with favorite crab snacks like mackerel or squid or sardines, pull them up snapping with crab, and steam back here to the commercial wharf, where Royal Seafood’s Gino Pennizi kindly lets her use a tank and a workspace to slang her crustaceans.

Here's a peek at the tank and a good old fashioned Crab Battle in a Bucket over at Royal, still my favorite place for seafood in town:



Market price at the moment was $6 per big fatty—DeLay says they are averaging between 1.9 pounds and 2.25—and an extra buck for her to cook them if that's too complicated for her customers.

Her recipe is nice, easy and tasty in that way that lets the crab speak for its own fresh self: Once the water in your crabpot is boiling, throw the suckers in with lemon juice and salt, bring it back to a boil and then cook them for 12 minute even.

She bagged my babies and I took to delivering to fridges around the Peninsula.

Crab Santa struck twice.

Later we spread newspaper everywhere as four friends and I had a supreme messy feast of chilled crustacean in hot garlic butter, garlic bread, salad, Sauv Blanc and Chardonnay.

DeLay says she'll be back on the high seas once the weather eases off the 10-foot-swell stress around Friday. Reach her at whaledances@yahoo.com 383-9681 for availability.

Fresh and sweet, simple and sublime. 'Tis the (crab) season.

Way Cooler Than Keanu Reeves

Leo might be "the one" to save us from The Meatrix.

Or maybe not.

Take the red pill and find out.



If you found that swine in sunglasses as undeniable as I did, the sequels await:





It was several years ago when these viral animated shorts began zooming around cyberspace. Now they've not only reached a ton of people—according to the Meatrix website, they have been translated into more than 30 languages, reached more than 15 million viewers and represent one of the most successful online advocacy campaigns ever—but provide easy and practical avenues to eating more consciously, including a pretty handy guide to help people find good food sources.

Better yet, they make effective elements for teachers to use with students, as they do at the MEarth Hilton Bialek Habitat in Carmel.

Onward with the revolution.

Channeling Christopher Walken and Other Tim Wood Goods

Over the course of a six-part tasting—including delicious day boat sea scallops with satsuma mandarin, citrus brown butter, shiso greens and black truffle shavings (hidden among the wonton crisps above)—Carmel Valley Ranch Executive Chef Tim Wood showed what he can do mighty well. (Read more about the new Carmel Valley Ranch experience and ownership in this week's issue, including a companion piece by yours truly about the restaurant's revival.)

We grazed on Wood's Black Angus sliders with New York cheddar and red pepper jelly, Swank Farms organic beet salad with shaved fennel and olive oil croutons, delicious lox and latkes (it was Hannukah, after all)...

...and a double-stuffed profiterole that had me reconsidering my long-held suspicion of them.

Captivating tastes, all. But it was his commentary that captivated us the most.

He riffed on growing up in the Catskills, the intense types he worked for in New York at spots like Manhattan's Butterfield 81, the early days with Cal Stamenov and Christophe Grosjean at Bernardus' beginning, dropping in impressions of bosses and colleagues as he went.

As the commentary continued—"I'm the one they send VIPs when they need to be entertained and they don't know what to do," he says—he toured us through the kitchen, where he paused to help a cook he calls "Earrings" (for his huge lobewear) master a sauce with notable clarity and cool...

...then through a backstage demo kitchen adjoining a ballroom. He's already scheming some inspired Iron Chef-style events.

My favorite part of his free-flow had to be the comparisons he drew between himself and the rampant wild turkeys cruising the property—"I'm like the turkey up there on the branch, wobbling back and forth, with everyone watching"—and Christopher Walken.

"I'm like the Christopher Walken of chefs," he says. "I don't use punctuation."

Here's hoping Wood can dance like C.W. too:

Alberto's Celebrity-Quality Italian Crowns P.G.

Richard Nixon and I never had much in common. With the help of one of the most memorable personalities in Pagrovia, that has changed.

The other night at Alberto's (373-3993) at the top of Forest Hill, Alberto Bonatelli made a pal and I the same veal scallopini piccata he prepped for ol' Tricky Dick.

As guilty pleasures go, this might be one of the most pleasurable. I now get what a friend who grew up in P.G. meant when she told me it's the best she's had, stateside or in Italy.

Plenty came along with the piccata. Like imported Chianti light enough to counterbalance rich ravioli carbonara worth writing the Old World about. And a chicken saltimboca up to the name. And a caprese salad with a nice proscuitto-cheese twist.

And homemade basil-cello was as good as it sounds.

And tiramasu, moist and chocolatey in all the right ways, enough to meet a high challenge—namely, delivering a closing taste potent enough to appropriately punctuate such a strong sequence of flavors.

But that's only part of what Bonatelli dishes out. After he pulled a chair up to our table, turned it backwards and slid into it like a gun into a holster—"This is my home," he replied to my amazement at how well he fit in it—he proceeded to drop more names than the Yellowpages.

He and his Orsini Restaurant were the darling of California’ cushiest bit of coastline, Malibu (nouth of Santa Monica), for the '80s and then some, and he came away with waves of raves and stories. Late nights with Frank Sinatra. Rubbing aprons with Nixon and a number of other heads of state. Neil Diamond's affection for his veal parmesan. In between glory stories he'd dash away to the nearby intimate kitchen and return with more riches and snuggle right up to our table.

Check out this article (click on it to make it bigger) for a taste of his celebrity cred/obsession:

Lightly legendary local food expert Ray Napolitano, my Weekly colleague going on about half a decade, is the one who mandated I visit. I asked him what he thinks differentiates Bonatelli.

"What you get there is him cooking," he says. "Really that's what it boils down to. There's something about the way he puts food together. It's not like recipes are out of this world—they're mostly standard. That's what it's about: I've always felt like you could give 10 people the same ingredients, equipment and nine of them will taste similar and one won't. It's an art. He's an artist. He is [literally] an artist too, he paints and everything else. [Bonatelli does the funky murals that adorn the walls of his one-room restaurant.]

"When guys like him do something it's an art form. It's inexplicable. Doesn't look like he's doing anything different. When he cooks, especially when he's inspired, he simply does an amazing job. The first time I walked in there, I ordered linguini putanesca, a simple dish with four powerful ingredients that can screw it up if unbalanced. I was like s***, this is amazing."

For my part, as I left for a starlight hike through neighboring Del Monte Forest to dent the small innertube that had migrated to my midsection over the last couple of hours, I couldn't resist thinking Alberto's has a legitimate claim to the best-Italian-in-town crown. Joe Rombi’s (373-2416) deserves a nomination, but is a little fancier and spendier. Peppoli (647-7500) is incredible but even more expensive, even by Pebble Beach standards. Gino’s (422-1814) is an institution that deservedly earns our readers' best Italian food vote, but it deploys a different, spaghetti-and-pizza, more family-centered style. Cantinetta Luca (625-6500) does modern-hip Italian with aplomb, but tends more toward Cali-Itali fusion than classic fare.

Why doesn't he get more traffic, then? Maybe because it’s tucked into a strip mall. Maybe because he relies on word of mouth. Maybe some would prefer less forward hospitality. I won't linger too long on those queries—besides, the restaurant community certainly are aware of him, as are locals in the know—because I'm happy to keep it our little secret. I know Tricky Dick is good at that.

Because It's Not a Road Trip Without In N Out

I’d like to believe in free will. But every time I go on a road trip, I get a tasty reminder that my fate isn’t so much my own to manage, because I inevitably end up at the only chain I frequent, a little place you may have heard of called In N Out.

A recent visit inspired me to contact In N Out headquarters to get the real deal on the off-the-menu items I hadn’t figured out yet. As it turns out, I had no idea what a "Flying Dutchman" existed, let alone what it might be.

On this roadie, I tested two new off-the-menu ideas (while only temporarily abandoning my long-ago-established classic "secrets," the grilled cheese with grilled onions and the animal-style fries).

First up: fries cooked to order, like a burger. (The In N Out rep at headquarters said they can do well-done/extra crispy, "light well" and "light," salt-free and with just cheese, in addition to the grilled-onion-cheese-and-special-sauce animal-style approach).

I felt a little diva-like ordering "medium well" fries until the sunny young lady replied, "Medium well done well done or lightly medium well"?

I took the former (pictured above on the left, compared to standard issue on the right). I don't think I'll order any other way from here forward—they're crispier and more flavorful thanks to bonus sizzle and grease time. The road trippers with me unanimously agreed.

I also soaked up a Neopolitan shake. I'll never have to choose between the vanilla, chocolate or strawberry seduction again. It's even better than the strawberry-chocolate combo.

Also, to stem the boring cascade of ketchup, I asked for some special sauce they put on animal style items and got a couple of packets (above right). Just what some medium well well fries needed.

For more on the secret menu and developments at the Seaside In N Out to be, check out my post from earlier this year.

The Goofy Monday Morning Food Vid You Crave

Unearthed this one from the annals of the Internet to help you manage the standard Monday morning mayhem. Cue the edible entertainment/relief.

(Bonus points if you can guess what's going on before the end of the ad reveals it. And if you can tell me where else udders get the spooky CGI treatment.)

New GM, Chef at Restaurant 1833

If you had to chose one word to describe Restaurant 1833, the destination restaurant that will eventually occupy the Stokes Adobe and, if plans click, a Mount Rushmore-sized spot in the local eating landscape, ambitious just might be it.

After all, the place is planned to accommodate upwards of 200 in distinct spaces ranging from a apothecary-style bar area to a loungy "library" to an outdoor patio-garden concept that is reportedly morphing from a collection of secret garden-style pocket sanctuaries into a more open venue for major events. Anyone who visited Pacific's Edge while Coastal Luxury Management co-founder Rob Weakley was at the controls knows he and co-founder David "Not Afraid of a $5,000 Bottle" Bernahl have designs on a wine list that can compete with heavyweights Marinus and Pac Edge. The menu will be high concept rustic by way of humble and elegant ingredients, and I predict the cocktail program will prove as heady as either by itself.

That's a lot. So it stands to reason that they recruit a world beater to manage the big fat multifaceted dream, and to fill the shoes of departed CLM standby and local hospitality legend Gary Obligacion.

That they did.

Tobias Peach already had a resume laden with foodie-seducing fruit when he stepped into his biggest gig yet in the summer of 2009. He had already opened Vegas' Craftsteak with Top Chef Tom Colicchio, turned heads as GM of Flor de Lys for another celeb chef in Hubert Keller, and managed the staff at San Francisco's revered Postrio before he took that gig, but the stakes were even higher : He was not just opening a Sage restaurant at the brand new, five-diamond Aria Casino & Resort, he was hiring the entire staff, ordering and receiving all the starting supplies and stocking and managing the entire beverage program.

The result? A Best New Restaurant nomination from the James Beard Foundation—the epicurean equivalent of the Motion Picture Academy's Oscar nomination.

His work there bodes very well for all aspects of the similarly scaled 1833. I'm particularly pumped on the beverage program after seeing what he did with absinthe for a Seven magazine piece.



Xania Woodman is the ace nightlife reporter/"career carouser" who directed the short and has been scouring Vegas' VIP booths, wine cellars and stainless steel bars for upwards of seven years.

"He has a spectacular food and beverage pedigree," she says. "He spent his time kind of taking a career tour of respected chefs of the world. Assuming that someone takes something with them everywhere they go—in addition to leaving something of themselves—imagine what he’s picked up. He impressed me a number of times with his beverage program. His food prowess is well known. At Fleur his absinthe cart ran over other programs. It was spectacular.

"He’s the kind of GM that builds personal relationships with purveyors, builds rapport with distillers, spirit brand owners, that sort of thing. He was able to offer things you’re simply not able to find elsewhere."

Hanging out with him Saturday night at a packed Cannery Row Brewing Company, I could tell from his down-to-earth demeanor that those relationships come naturally. The best news here has to be that it was Prunetucky that helped the Peninsula net one of Vegas' hottest young playmakers. He has family there who he wants to be close to while he still can, and we are the lucky bastards that get to benefit.

He'll be joined at 1833 by Chef Jon Mathieson of Washington D.C., another big-city coup of sorts, and himself a quiet visionary.

His Inox restaurant in the 'burbs of the capital earned him lofty praise—one columnist described the scene in the kitchen thusly: "In my line of vision I have perfect food, a gorgeous kitchen, a chef who clearly loves his job."

Coastal Luxury Management's discovery of Mathieson involved no small amount of serendipity. He was the chef at the restaurant adjoining the offices of Red Zone Entertainment, which owns CLM partner Dick Clark Productions.

"We've never had a bad course there," Weakley says. "He just knocked it out of the park three straight times. We couldn’t be more stoked—and we're excited for Monterey."

More on Mathieson's past menu magic and what it will mean for 1833 soon.